Nick Bruzon has a look at the five worst England managers of all time.
Tuesday night saw the Hampden Park friendly between Scotland and England, commemorating the 150-year anniversary of the first meeting between the sides back in 1872. Albeit calling this one a friendly is much akin to calling Mrs Brown’s Boys a comedy, such is the intensity in which it has been played out over the years. This most recent of games being no exception with the partisan home support urging on their team like the proverbial 12th man.
In the end though, it was a case of more of the same. Anthems and silences were booed, England won (1999 and Mr Browns Boys – Craig, that is – the last time Scotland scooped bragging rights) and perhaps most predictable of all, Harry Maguire was the centre of attention.
That his own goal which halved the deficit only twenty minutes after coming on to replace Marc Guéhi wasn’t even the main talking point highlighted the current focus on England. The lazy leg he stuck out to divert the ball past Arsenal goalkeeper Aaron Ramsdale symptomatic of a player so woefully out of form and favour at club level that England manager Gareth Southgate was coming under ever-increasing scrutiny as to his almost blind devotion to this loyal retainer.
46' - Harry Maguire comes on for England (🏴 2-0 🏴)
— ESPN FC (@ESPNFC) September 12, 2023
67' - Harry Maguire own goal (🏴 2-1 🏴)
Tough 😰 pic.twitter.com/R9kMiLRAB2
Harry can’t necessarily be blamed for not being picked at club level. Like any of us, I am sure he relished the chance to play for his country when selected. Likewise, only a fool would fail to acknowledge that on his day he has been incredible for England. His performances in the 2018 World Cup finals, culminating in victory over Sweden in the quarter-finals, producing a ‘meme’ to rival Picard’s facepalm or the ‘This is Fine’ dog.
Yet both of those could, ironically, be rolled out by Southgate’s critics (of which there are many) every time he names the likes of Maguire, Saudi-based Jordan Henderson or the rarely plays at club-level Kalvin Phillips in his squad these days. Let alone his starting XI.
The chagrin felt every time a group is announced is less directed at individuals and more the inconsistency applied by the manager. The regular selection of his favoured few, even when they’ve been doing nothing more than laps with the reserves or keeping the physios busy.
Again, not their fault. We’d all be there like a shot if asked yet the ignoring of certain players is turning into a rod which Gareth is now using for a particularly masochistic form of self-flagellation. Going into the Scotland game there was an almost voracious appetite for failure from the vultures that circle social media. Waiting for something, anything, to go wrong so that the boot could then be put in with interest.
I’ve rallied many times as much about those players Gareth doesn’t pick as those he does. I couldn’t do his job and having taken his team to a World Cup semi (albeit with a very favourable draw) and European Championship final (albeit at home) in the last few years, he must be doing something right. Yet it is the failure to adequately address the questions about selection that are truly irritating so many supporters. His obsession with sticking to tried and tested rather than experiment when given the opportunity.
Imagine the likes of Brian Clough or Alex Ferguson pussyfooting around the press like Gareth does. You can’t because they wouldn’t.
If some players are untouchable then I wish he’d just come out and say it rather than tying himself up in contradictory knots.
If some players can be in the form of their lives (Rico Henry and Raheem Sterling, we’re looking at the pair of you in particular) but have no hope of being picked then, again, just ‘fess up.
England looked great against Scotland but the previous game against Ukraine was hardly the sort of breath-taking football to inspire. It did give concern, again, as to what would happen when the major step up was needed.
This got me thinking about England managers as a whole and the realisation that despite the national side’s inception back in 1872, there have only ever been 15 of them. Prior to the appointment of Walter Winterbottom in 1946 the team had been selected via committee. That they’ve only ever won one thing of note – a World Cup that took place on home soil almost 60 years ago.
When you look at the names and form of those 15, is Gareth worthy of the criticism coming his way at present? Whilst he wouldn’t make my top three (Bobby Robson – 1st; Terry Venables – 2nd; Sir Alf Ramsey – 3rd being untouchable) – there have been some stinkers over that period.
Before you moan about Gareth too much, and it is easy to do so, just think back to those who have gone before. The worst England managers of all time
5 - Glenn Hoddle
How could Glenn fail? Quite easily, as it happened. Mercurial as a player, he took over in the aftermath of Euro ’96 with the side’s stock high. A semi-final defeat on penalties that followed the group stage destruction of Scotland (Oh, Gazza’s goal) and Netherlands (England were 4-0 up within the hour) had left a nation feeling like we were world beaters. Surely the baton would be picked up and run with at the World Cup in France two years later?
Alas not. His dropping of Paul Gascoigne ahead of the tournament was controversial and his cause wasn’t helped by adding ‘faith healer’ Eileen Drewery to his back-room staff. Second place in the group stage included a defeat to Romania and a reticence to begin with the inform Michael Owen before going out in the last 16 to Argentina on penalties
However, the combination of a dour start to Euro 2000 qualifying combined with an offensive interview given to Matt Dickinson of The Times in which he claimed that disabled people were being punished for their sins in a former life proved to be his ultimate undoing,
“You and I have been physically given two hands and two legs and half-decent brains. Some people have not been born like that for a reason. The karma is working from another lifetime. I have nothing to hide about that. It is not only people with disabilities. What you sow, you have to reap. “
February 2nd 1999 Glenn Hoddle was sacked as England's football coach after his comments that disabled people were reaping the punishment for something done in a previous life. pic.twitter.com/JuD9lpE7jJ
— Garry Pickles 🇬🇧 (@garrypickles) February 2, 2023
4 - Kevin Keegan
It could have worked. It should have worked. If nothing else he had the ‘free hit’ of taking over from Glen Hoddle yet, in hindsight, the signs were there. Wonderful as a player, his managerial career had seen mixed results. Newcastle United had been 12 points clear during the 95-96 title as late on as February yet fell over on the line as Manchester United raced clear. Perhaps alarm bells should have been ringing with ‘that’ meltdown in front of the Sky cameras but, instead, he graduated to England via Fulham after resigning at St. James’ Park.
Alas, he needn’t have bothered. Euro 2000 was only reached via a two-legged defeat of Scotland (including the aforementioned win for Craig Brown). Loses to Romania and Portugal (where England had been 2-0 up with little over a quarter hour played) saw his side knocked out in the group stages.
Keegan’s attempt to qualify for World Cup 2002 began and ended in the opening fixture. The final international game at the ‘old’ Wembley could have been wonderful for all concerned but, instead, it ended with a 1-0 defeat to Germany and Keegan subsequently resigning from inside a toilet cubicle.
#OnThisDay in 1996...
— Sky Sports Premier League (@SkySportsPL) April 29, 2021
Kevin Keegan produced his famous rant about Sir Alex Ferguson and Manchester United pic.twitter.com/913iPGhUdC
3 - Fabio Capello
Awful. Awful. Awful. It had all started so well with World Cup 2010 being reached with what seemed consummate ease. 27 points from a possible 30 (only defeat away to Ukraine prevented a perfect record) suggested that the combination of Fabio’s authority and England’s (latest) golden generation might finally lift the albatross of 1966.
Instead, we were treated to one of the most woeful tournament performances of all time. A true horror show with the 0-0 draw against Algeria in the group stages having since been deemed the medical cure to insomnia.
England limped into the knockout stages where they were run absolutely ragged by Germany. The game may well be remembered for Frank Lampard’s disallowed ‘goal’ that was deemed not to have crossed the line but, let’s be clear, it would have made no difference. 4-1 winners Germany were playing at a different level to an England side unable to adapt and being torn to shreds.
🚫 Phones
— talkSPORT (@talkSPORT) January 19, 2022
🚫 Loungewear
🚫 Ketchup
🚫 Sitting on footballs
“He went absolutely ballistic!”
Darren Bent reveals what Fabio Capello 𝗕𝗔𝗡𝗡𝗘𝗗 when he managed England. 😳 pic.twitter.com/XSCKvLL8va
2 - Sam Allardyce
Finally. The people’s choice, apparently, Sam had already lost out on the job back in 2006 when he was pipped to the post by Steve McClaren. Instead, he had to wait a further 10 years before finally getting his chance ahead of qualification for World Cup 2018.
You’d think after bidding his time he’d tread carefully but, instead Sam lasted just one game. That’s 63 days and a 1-0 injury-time defeat of Slovakia before being caught out by The Telegraph’s ‘Football for Sale’ Sting operation.
His opinions on Gary Neville and predecessor Roy Hodgson (who he called Woy) as being no use as a public speaker because “he’d send them all to sleep, he hasn’t got the personality” were only the tip of an iceberg that peaked with his advice to undercover journalists on how to circumnavigate rules on third-party ownership of players.
Sam was left with no choice but to resign by mutual consent with a half-arsed apology issued via the FA.
Sam Allardyce sacked as England manager.
— Not Match of the Day (@NOT_MOTD) September 27, 2016
• 1 game
• 1 win
• 1 clean sheet
• 100% win record
- 1 undercover sting
- 1 sacking pic.twitter.com/HmBKXQNAqR
1 - Steve McClaren
It could only be Steve for the worst ever. A man who will be permanently blighted by the image of an oversized umbrella. He was already fatally holed below the waterline before sheltering from that deluge rather than inspiring his team in their doomed attempts to qualify for Euro 2008.
Winning only seven of twelve games from a group that included Andorra, Estonia and Macedonia was bad. Worse, when you consider the talent at his disposal. Instead, England limped into third place, ahead of Israel only on goal difference.
A 3-2 defeat to group winners Croatia as he kept his suit dry, forever earning him the title of ‘The wally with the brolly’.
Feel bad for Steve McLaren, no matter how much rain is falling he can never use an umbrella. pic.twitter.com/zdSfGSJmEP
— Gaby McKay (@GabyMcKay) January 27, 2017